Is Your "Woke Bae" Really Woke?

So you thought you found the perfect match, but now you're starting to see some red flags. It's important to stay vigilant and pay attention to these signs. Trust your instincts and remember that you deserve someone who is on the same page as you. For more tips on navigating the dating world, check out this helpful resource to make sure you're making the right choice.

In today's dating world, being "woke" has become a desirable trait in a partner. The term "woke" refers to being aware of social and political issues, and being actively anti-racist, feminist, and supportive of LGBTQ+ rights. However, just because a guy claims to be woke, doesn't mean he actually is. Here are 15 signs the guy you're dating isn't the woke bae he thinks he is.

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1. He dismisses your experiences as a woman or person of color.

One of the first signs that your partner may not be as woke as he claims is if he dismisses your experiences as a woman or person of color. If he invalidates your feelings or experiences, it's a clear indication that he's not as empathetic or understanding as he claims to be.

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2. He doesn't actively support marginalized communities.

Being woke isn't just about being aware of social issues, it's also about actively supporting and advocating for marginalized communities. If your partner doesn't take the time to support causes or actively work towards social justice, he may not be as woke as he claims.

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3. He uses offensive language or jokes.

Using offensive language or making inappropriate jokes is a clear sign that your partner may not be as woke as he claims. Language is important, and if he isn't mindful of the words he uses, it's a red flag that he may not truly understand the impact of his words.

4. He doesn't listen to your perspective.

Being woke means being open to different perspectives and experiences. If your partner doesn't listen to your perspective or dismisses it, it's a sign that he may not be as open-minded as he claims to be.

5. He doesn't educate himself on social issues.

Being woke requires continuous education and self-reflection. If your partner isn't actively seeking out information on social issues or doesn't take the time to educate himself, he may not be as woke as he claims.

6. He's defensive when called out on problematic behavior.

If your partner gets defensive or dismisses criticism when called out on problematic behavior, it's a clear sign that he may not be as empathetic or open to growth as he claims.

7. He only supports causes when it's convenient.

Being woke means supporting causes even when it's not convenient. If your partner only supports causes when it's convenient for him, it's a sign that he may not be as committed to social justice as he claims.

8. He doesn't challenge his own privilege.

Being woke also means recognizing and challenging your own privilege. If your partner doesn't actively challenge his privilege or acknowledge the ways in which he benefits from systems of oppression, he may not be as woke as he claims.

9. He doesn't respect your boundaries.

Respecting boundaries is an important aspect of being woke. If your partner doesn't respect your boundaries, it's a sign that he may not be as respectful or understanding as he claims.

10. He doesn't actively support your goals and ambitions.

Being woke means supporting and uplifting the people around you. If your partner doesn't actively support your goals and ambitions, it's a sign that he may not be as supportive or empowering as he claims.

11. He only engages in performative activism.

Performative activism refers to actions that are done for show, rather than out of genuine concern for social justice. If your partner only engages in performative activism, it's a sign that he may not be as committed to social justice as he claims.

12. He doesn't take responsibility for his mistakes.

Taking responsibility and apologizing for mistakes is an important aspect of being woke. If your partner doesn't take responsibility for his mistakes, it's a sign that he may not be as self-aware or accountable as he claims.

13. He doesn't challenge toxic masculinity.

One aspect of being woke is challenging toxic masculinity and traditional gender roles. If your partner doesn't actively challenge toxic masculinity, it's a sign that he may not be as progressive or understanding as he claims.

14. He doesn't actively work to unlearn harmful beliefs.

Being woke also means actively working to unlearn harmful beliefs and biases. If your partner isn't actively working to unlearn harmful beliefs, it's a sign that he may not be as committed to personal growth as he claims.

15. He doesn't make space for marginalized voices.

Being woke means making space for marginalized voices and actively listening to their experiences. If your partner doesn't make space for marginalized voices, it's a sign that he may not be as empathetic or understanding as he claims.

In conclusion, being woke is more than just a label - it's a commitment to social justice, empathy, and personal growth. If your partner exhibits any of these signs, it may be time to reevaluate whether he's truly the woke bae he claims to be. Remember, actions speak louder than words, and it's important to hold your partner accountable for their behavior.